goals not reached/disappointing races

[alexk]

The thread on goals has gotten me thinking about and reliving all my bad races...

I'm wondering what some of you coaches on RM tell the runners you train when they have a bad race, when they work really hard at achieving a goal but fall short on race day. What advice do you offer up? I realise each case would be unique, but in general, how do you get them to refocus?

This question is for anyone actually. What do you do when your race doesn't go as planned?

[CinC]

I'm not a coach nor am getting coached this year, but I did get some advice from a coach my husband has used.

The goal is no longer a 'time' goal. Time goals are so black and white. You set a goal of a 2hr half marathon. you come in at 2:01. you might have pbed, but you missed that original goal. fail.

And last year, I set some great pbs (as they were the primary goals) - in pretty much all the distances I raced - 5k, 10k, half marathon, oly tri, half IM tri - all of these weren't the main goal of last year (which was to just finish IMC).

So, I start 2010....and guess what - I haven't PBed a race yet. not the full. not the half. not the Half IM. But am I proud of my results? yes. Because my goal is now to work as hard as I can when I race. To not 'give up'. To not say 'it's ok to walk'. To just give it my all, and whatever the time is, the time is.

I'm not going to lie and say that I don't have time goals (as they still are always there and can be motivators), but the TIME goal is not the PRIMARY goal anymore.

As in the words of the pro we hosted last summer for the Calgary 70.3 'Go as hard as I can for as long as I can'.

It's been working.

[La]

If you don't reach your goals you are a failure and the entire world comes to an end.

Seriously, I get that goals are important to people, and that they can serve as motivators to get out and get the workouts done; but when you end up feeling bad about yourself because you didn't reach a goal, doesn't that defeat the purpose?

Goals are very personal and they have different levels of importance to each of us. Everyone measures and deals with failure differently. Learning to overcome a perceived failure is an important part of the training (heck, life-learning!) process. And it's important to distinguish between a failed attempt, and not equating that to being "a failure."

Remember what Thomas Jefferson said about how he "failed" more than 100 times when trying to invent the lightbulb: "I didn't fail; I learned 100 ways NOT to make a lightbulb."

[gnu]

Remember what Thomas Jefferson said about how he "failed" more than 100 times when trying to invent the lightbulb: "I didn't fail; I learned 100 ways NOT to make a lightbulb."

That would be Thomas Edison

[turd ferguson]

I'm not a coach either.

I had a boss (company president) once who got pissed off if all his departments met all their goals. If that happened, he said we weren't setting our goals aggressively enough. The point wasn't to set goals we knew we could make without risk of failure.

Or to quote another saying, if your arrow hits the target every time, the target is either too large or too close.

Occasional (or even frequent) failure isn't a bad thing - to me its a sign that your goals are aggressive, which is a good thing.

[दिवंगत]

Or to quote another saying, if your arrow hits the target every time, the target is either too large or too close.

Occasional (or even frequent) failure isn't a bad thing - to me its a sign that your goals are aggressive, which is a good thing.

+1

I set aggressive goals for myself and frequently fail to meet them. Doesn't mean I don't enjoy the trying, because I do. If I have a bad race I try to figure out why, learn the leassons and move forward.

I have a very difficult but not unreachable goal for my next race. I can meet it if I perform to my best ability, I don't make any mistakes, the conditions aren't unfavourable and I get a little luck. If I make it I'll be very very happy; if I don't I'll be at the same time disappointed and also happy that the goal is still there to chase.

If I were a coach, this is what I'd tell my athletes.

[alexk]

I should have added that I've never been coached; have very little experience in organised sport. My approach has always been very amateur. Usually I'm not bothered by bad races, sum them up as a bad day and move on. And I'm not too bothered this time either; just a bit. Maybe it's because I named my goals, worked so hard on the training, felt so ready...

Or maybe it's just because I wanted it so badly and didn't get it. I'll press on with a bit less pressure and a better view of the bigger picture.

[Ironboy]

We've had a couple of lengthy (5 pagers) discussions about this kind of thing, lofty goal setting, reaching our potential, journey vs. destination type stuff.

Ultimately we are all different and what floats my boat won't necessarily float yours.

Many see a failure as a learning experience. I recently re-read Ian's 2009 marathon report in iRun (12 marathons in a year) and invariable the races he had no real time goal and no real expectation he had the best performances.

I don't race enough for this, and therefore every race becomes a pressure point to perform. But perhaps one day.

[VeloCarrie]

If I fail at my job = someone dies.

If I fail at a running goal = try again.

AFAIC, it's really that simple. It's a hobby.

[Robbie-T]

Failing at hitting a goal sucks, I doubt no one can deny this, no matter how much or little you love this sport.

Just by not making a goal means you spent time (maybe hours/days/years even) thinking about it preparing and performing. So by all means it is OK to be disappointed and everyone deals with disappointment differently. Let them feel disappointment, it is a strong feeling that you will do everything to try to avoid next time.

The key is to analyze your performance once you are good to that with your coach/friend and find out "What went wrong? and What went right?" openly and honestly. There are all kinds of reasons, uncontrollable ones (weather, mechanical...), mental (strategy, pacing...), physical (tired, not strong enough...) Figure out which ones you need to work on and put a plan together that focuses on your weaknesses, there is always something that you can improve on. Move forward and use the missed goal as a motivator for next time, and for that matter and future race. Never forget those races, don't hate on them or let them control you, but use them as reminders of what you don't want to do and don't want to feel for next time.

Heck you should even go through this process after successes too, you can always improve on something.

[Kristen]

Alex, while I'm not a running coach and I have very limited experience with coaching (just a year of volunteer swim coaching), there is a tiny section in Daniels' Running Formula on ingredients for success. Just thought I would share this as it talks about different kinds of runners and the coach role:

Ingredients for Success (pages xv to xviii)

I know a lot of this is common sense, but I figure it's a good reminder that each of us is unique and we should take unique approaches to tackling challenges and disappointments. While I think it's important to remember that not hitting a running goal is not like death (or divorce), it can be very difficult. The good news is that there is opportunity around the corner if one is able to see the stuff that went well, as well as identify a few challenging-yet-realistic goals for the next race. That said, I still think it's important to acknowledge the emotions (sadness, anger, etc.) and to sit with them a bit. Once they fade (and they will), then it's time to refocus.

[alexk]

Tks for the replies - sorry that my question had been exhausted before. I'm really fine with my race; just your average "maybe I could have done better if" musings. I feel like I'm at a juncture where I'm trying to decide how much more I want to invest in this racing/marathoning thing. I really do see the smallness of it all in the bigger life picture; for me it is just a hobby too. But it's a hobby that I really enjoy and it's the only athletic pursuit I've been half decent at doing.

[Jwolf]

Some good answers here. A few comments based on my experiences and observations:

Many see a failure as a learning experience. I recently re-read Ian's 2009 marathon report in iRun (12 marathons in a year) and invariable the races he had no real time goal and no real expectation he had the best performances.

I don't race enough for this, and therefore every race becomes a pressure point to perform

I think this is pretty important. Doing more races not only gives you more experience and chances to learn, but also more chances for success. You can learn something and move forward in fitness with each race, both good and bad.

With marathons it becomes more challenging because most of us only build up to one big race at the end of a marathon training cycle. And while I agree with this whole-heartedly...

The key is to analyze your performance once you are good to that with your coach/friend and find out "What went wrong? and What went right?" openly and honestly.

... I also know that it's not always easy to figure out exactly why someone misses their goal.

I know personally I have to resist the urge to attach so much to one ultimate time goal in my marathon coming up, even though I do have an "important" time goal. There's just too much can happen on the one day of the race even if your training is perfect (illness, non-perfect taper, weather, etc.), and unfortunately small mistakes can be magnified in marathon results. Having seen one good friend DNF in Boston and another miss her BQ time, both of whom were so well-trained for their marathons (along with countless others who missed goal times that they thought they could do) I know that nothing is "given" in the marathon. If it were easy, it wouldn't be so special.

And in the end, maintaining perspective is key. I learned this well from that first friend. He had trained so diligently for six months, and for some unexpected reason couldn't keep going after mile 14. It was devastating, yes... but he knew he'd have other chances and other successes down the road.

[QuickChick]

I have been there, Alex- I still look at my Waterfront Marathon in Sept. as a total failure even though I crossed the finish line. I had set myself up with an A goal of 5:10/km for the first half and then speeding up (sub 3:38), a B goal of 3:39:59 and that was it. Consequently, when I realized at about 35km that I was likely not going to reach my B goal, I totally broke down in every sense. My race was over. IF I ever do another marathon, I am going to have to figure out a different strategy so that I don't break down that way. For instance if I could run even splits, that would be great. If I did a negative split, great. If no women passed me after 30K, great. If I could plan my nutrition well enough that I didn't bonk, great. Even something like "well I felt like crap for 2km but then I got through it and sped up again". There are more goals to work towards in racing than just time goals, and lots of ways to measure success. I have been able to look at my spring races this way- for instance my 5K was not a pb, but I was happy that I ran the hills strongly, and I was able to speed up in the fourth and fifth km and that made it a success. In Bread and Honey, I was just as happy that no women passed me after about 6K as I was with my overall time.

The thing that helps me the most after a disappointing race is to race again, and soon. The thing with shorter races, though, is if at first you don't succeed you can try, try again, and that is huge. So much depends on the day! My friend and summer run buddy also bonked at Waterfront, and she was able to bounce back and run about 15 minutes faster 5 weeks later in Hamilton. If you're like me, though, and find it hard to bounce back from a marathon, maybe it would help to focus on the excellent training you did and the fitness you gained that will set you up for this summer/fall racing. Once you're recovered and running strong again, do some shorter races and get the taste of success back in your mouth!

[mcshame]

If I fail at my job = someone dies.

I don't race enough for this, and therefore every race becomes a pressure point to perform. But perhaps one day.

Interesting points. Life is about pressure and stresses. They cause us to perform, they drive us to succeed. Medical practitioners are under considerable stress, life and death stress. They control that stress and channel it to perform. Mankind evolves by adapting and dealing with stresses. The body adapts to stresses we place on it by strengthening it. Of course, too much stress in life causes failures and can results in breakdowns.

For me, stress at a certain level causes me to perform. This is true at work and in my training. By setting goals/targets, I strive to achieve them. I don't turn them into life and death, but I channel that energy and the fear of failure to drive performance.

If I don't achieve a goal, I don't like it. I don't like it in my professional life or my personnel life. I will get over it and put it into perspective but my failures will drive my future performances to not fail again. I think for performance minded individuals, it's okay to be unhappy with a performance.

Just get it right the next time

Disclaimer, I'm a deranged type D (Dominant/Driver) person according to the DESA model

[MichaelMc]

To me the process is the key. I try to get people to test their current fitness, then decide what aspects of their fitness they want to improve and work out a plan to do so. Follow the plan towards race day, and with some test races choose a "challenging but achieveable goal". On race day, all you can do is execute the plan and adapt to what happens. In this method, the goal isn't some arbitrary number, it is based on your training results. If you don't achieve it then you need to decide if you made a mistake in CHOOSING the goal, an error in execution, or simple bad luck.

If the problem was weather, the flu, or just a low energy day, well it may suck but you still did everything you could and that is all you can ask. If it was an error, then okay, learn from that. The goal is internal, frankly nobody else really cares about the actual time, the people who care for us only really care whether we're happy. Not getting the BQ (or whatever) probably won't wreck anyone else's day/week/year except for feeling bad for you.

Coming out of a training cycle ought to make one more fit as well as more knowledgeable about their fitness and training. Even if you don't hit the number you have chosen in your race that should put you in a better place than where you started. If you actually like the TRAINING process, then the race is just a small piece of it.

[Jo-Jo]

This question is for anyone actually. What do you do when your race doesn't go as planned?

What do I do?
1. Sulk.
2. Process and analyse.
3. Step back...and put the race in perspective...
3. Move on.

[La]

Remember what Thomas Jefferson said about how he "failed" more than 100 times when trying to invent the lightbulb: "I didn't fail; I learned 100 ways NOT to make a lightbulb."

That would be Thomas Edison

Thank you. Total brain fart there.

[Jwolf]

This question is for anyone actually. What do you do when your race doesn't go as planned?

What do I do?
1. Sulk.
2. Process and analyse.
3. Step back...and put the race in perspective...
3. Move on.

Excellent summary!

[turd ferguson]

Remember what Thomas Jefferson said about how he "failed" more than 100 times when trying to invent the lightbulb: "I didn't fail; I learned 100 ways NOT to make a lightbulb."

That would be Thomas Edison

Thank you. Total brain fart there.

Idiot. Thomas Jefferson invented relativity.

[erinmcd]

That would be Thomas Edison

Thank you. Total brain fart there.

Idiot. Thomas Jefferson invented relativity.

I thought it was humidity? Or humility? I can never remember.

[turd ferguson]

We've had a couple of lengthy (5 pagers) discussions about this kind of thing, lofty goal setting, reaching our potential, journey vs. destination type stuff.

Ultimately we are all different and what floats my boat won't necessarily float yours.

Many see a failure as a learning experience. I recently re-read Ian's 2009 marathon report in iRun (12 marathons in a year) and invariable the races he had no real time goal and no real expectation he had the best performances.

I don't race enough for this, and therefore every race becomes a pressure point to perform. But perhaps one day.

You're raising a bunch of good points James.

I focused my response on the idea of not hitting a goal in a race because that was the original question. I also think its important to set training goals as well - get all your runs in, stretch, yoga, whatever, all the "process" goals. And I'm 1000 times more disappointed in myself if I don't hit those goals than if I miss a race goal because all of the process goals should be within my control.

[turd ferguson]

...On race day, all you can do is execute the plan and adapt to what happens. In this method, the goal isn't some arbitrary number, it is based on your training results. If you don't achieve it then you need to decide if you made a mistake in CHOOSING the goal, an error in execution, or simple bad luck.

If the problem was weather, the flu, or just a low energy day, well it may suck but you still did everything you could and that is all you can ask. If it was an error, then okay, learn from that. ...

I agree with this completely. What I wonder about (and would appreciate your insight on) is how you decide whether a failure was a mistake in choosing a goal, error in execution, or bad luck.

I'm asking because I hear so many runners approaching race day thinking of all the reasons they're going to fail (hot weather, bad sleep, lack of water stations, course issues) and I wonder if there's a tendency to blame external factors first rather than blame ourselves for either inappropriate goal setting or failure to train.

ETA: I realised that the latter applies in corporate life as well. I see people set goals and at the same time hear the excuses starting (global downturn, interest rates, whatever) so that if the person hits their goals they're a hero but if they miss, its not their fault. Nothing bugs me more than a lack of accountability.

[Jo-Jo]

This question is for anyone actually. What do you do when your race doesn't go as planned?

What do I do?
1. Sulk.
2. Process and analyse.
3. Step back...and put the race in perspective...
3. Move on.

Excellent summary!

I would have put on as 1a) whine to someone but Mike never liked listening to my whining when he was coaching me and still doesn't. And Robbie-T's pretty much the same way. I'm trying to find a more sympathetic audience somewhere

[Robbie-T]

What do I do?
1. Sulk.
2. Process and analyse.
3. Step back...and put the race in perspective...
3. Move on.

Excellent summary!

I would have put on as 1a) whine to someone but Mike never liked listening to my whining when he was coaching me and still doesn't. And Robbie-T's pretty much the same way. I'm trying to find a more sympathetic audience somewhere

Running faster eliminates the need for 1 a)